How to Propose

Ready to propose but not sure where to start? After planning more than 10,000 marriage proposals, we’ve learned that the best proposals aren’t about following a perfect formula. They’re about knowing your partner, planning the details, and creating a moment that feels like the two of you. Here are 10 things to think about before you ask one of life’s biggest questions.

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STEP 01

Make Sure You’re On The Same Page

The proposal can be a surprise. The decision to get married shouldn’t be. Before you start planning how to propose, make sure you’ve talked about your future together and that marriage is something you both want. You don’t need to know exactly when or how it will happen—that’s where the surprise comes in—but you should feel confident you’re heading toward the same future.

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STEP 02

Consider Whether to Ask for Their Family’s Blessing

For some couples, asking a parent or family member for their blessing is an important tradition; for others, it isn’t part of the relationship at all. Think about what would matter to your partner. If you know they would appreciate the gesture, have the conversation personally whenever possible—whether that’s in person, by video call, or over the phone.

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STEP 03

Choose the Ring

There’s no rule that says the engagement ring has to be a complete surprise. Some people have a very specific style in mind and want to shop together; others would love for their partner to choose it. Pay attention to what your partner wants, learn their ring size and preferences, and give yourself enough time if the ring needs to be custom made or resized.


STEP 04

Figure Out How You’ll Hide the Ring

If the ring is part of your proposal, think about how you’ll carry it without giving away the surprise. A bulky ring box can be surprisingly obvious in a pocket, so choose a slim ring box that is also secure—and make sure you know exactly where the ring is before the big moment.

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STEP 05

Choose The Right Location

The best proposal location isn’t necessarily the most impressive one—it’s the one that feels right for your partner. Think about places connected to your relationship, destinations you both love, or settings where your partner will feel comfortable. Consider privacy, crowds, weather, accessibility, photography, and whether you’ll need a permit or reservation before making the final choice.

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STEP 06

Create a Proposal that feels personal

Start with your partner, not Pinterest. Think about the places, memories, music, traditions, passions, and inside jokes that are part of your relationship. You don’t need to incorporate everything—the goal is to choose a few meaningful details that make your partner realize this moment could only have been created for them.

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STEP 07

Get Help if you need it!

You can absolutely plan a proposal yourself. But if your idea involves a private venue, multiple vendors, décor, entertainment, permits, complicated logistics—or you simply want help creating the idea—a proposal planner can take those pieces off your plate. Michele and Marvin can design and coordinate the entire experience so you can focus on the person you’re proposing to.


STEP 08

Plan What You Want to Say

You don’t need to memorize a perfect speech, but don’t wait until you’re on one knee to decide what you want to say. Think about what you love about your partner, a memory that captures your relationship, and what you’re looking forward to in your future together. Write down a few thoughts beforehand, then speak naturally when the moment comes.


STEP 09

Ask The Question

When the moment arrives, slow down. Take in your partner’s reaction, say what you came to say, and clearly ask the question. Don’t rush through it because you’re nervous. This is one of those rare moments when a few seconds can become a memory you’ll both replay for the rest of your lives.

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STEP 10

Celebrate Before You Announce

Before you reach for your phone, give yourselves a little time to enjoy being newly engaged. Celebrate together, take photos, have Champagne or dinner, and let the moment sink in. Then call the people who matter most before posting the news publicly. If family or friends are part of the surprise, you can also plan an engagement celebration for afterward.

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Keep planning your proposal

READY TO PUT THIS INTO ACTION? 

 You’ve got the roadmap. Since 2010, Michele and Marvin have personally planned and executed over 10,000 proposals worldwide – let us help you bring yours to life.